you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Randomize
