It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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