omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
