physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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