He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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