is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
