Just cropdusted the office
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
