I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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