Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
