Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
