i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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