I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
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