There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
