I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
