On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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