His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
