their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
if only i could text you this smell
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
