we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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