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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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