dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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