So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
