i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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