Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
