I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Randomize
