just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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