Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
