I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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