and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
