I heard we made out
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize