I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
