one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
