Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
