You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I got inside last night via doggy door
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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