we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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