Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
