Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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