Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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