im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
