Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
