When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
