Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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