on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
