Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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