someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I wear drunk well.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
