That's when you crack a 10am beer
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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