This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
