the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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