You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
