Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize