Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
